Chapter 8—Common Courtship Practices
      
      
        Wrong Ideas of Courtship and Marriage—The ideas of
      
      
        courtship have their foundation in erroneous ideas concerning mar-
      
      
        riage. They follow impulse and blind passion. The courtship is carried
      
      
        on in a spirit of flirtation. The parties frequently violate the rules of
      
      
        modesty and reserve and are guilty of indiscretion, if they do not break
      
      
        the law of God. The high, noble, lofty design of God in the institution
      
      
        of marriage is not discerned; therefore the purest affections of the
      
      
        heart, the noblest traits of character are not developed.
      
      
        Not one word should be spoken, not one action performed, that
      
      
        you would not be willing the holy angels should look upon and register
      
      
        in the books above. You should have an eye single to the glory of
      
      
        God. The heart should have only pure, sanctified affection, worthy of
      
      
        the followers of Jesus Christ, exalted in its nature, and more heavenly
      
      
        than earthly. Anything different from this is debasing, degrading in
      
      
        courtship; and marriage cannot be holy and honorable in the sight of a
      
      
        pure and holy God, unless it is after the exalted Scriptural principle
      
      
      
      
        The youth trust altogether too much to impulse. They should not
      
      
        give themselves away too easily, nor be captivated too readily by the
      
      
        winning exterior of the lover. Courtship as carried on in this age is a
      
      
        scheme of deception and hypocrisy, with which the enemy of souls
      
      
        has far more to do than the Lord. Good common sense is needed here
      
      
        if anywhere; but the fact is, it has little to do in the matter
      
      
      
      
         [56]
      
      
        Keeping Late Hours—The habit of sitting up late at night is cus-
      
      
        tomary; but it is not pleasing to God, even if you are both Christians.
      
      
        These untimely hours injure health, unfit the mind for the next day’s
      
      
        duties, and have an appearance of evil. My brother, I hope you will
      
      
        have self-respect enough to shun this form of courtship. If you have an
      
      
        eye single to the glory of God, you will move with deliberate caution.
      
      
        You will not suffer lovesick sentimentalism to so blind your vision
      
      
        1
      
      
         Manuscript 4a, 1885
      
      
        .
      
      
        2
      
      
         Fundamentals of Christian Education, 105
      
      
        .
      
      
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