Chapter 37—The Kind of Husband Not To Be
The Husband Who Expects Wife to Carry Double Burdens—
In most families there are children of various ages, some of whom need
not only the attention and wise discipline of the mother but also the
sterner, yet affectionate, influence of the father. Few fathers consider
this matter in its due importance. They fall into neglect of their own
duty and thus heap grievous burdens upon the mother, at the same time
feeling at liberty to criticize and condemn her actions according to
their judgment. Under this heavy sense of responsibility and censure,
the poor wife and mother often feels guilty and remorseful for that
which she has done innocently or ignorantly, and frequently when she
has done the very best thing possible under the circumstances. Yet
when her wearisome efforts should be appreciated and approved and
her heart made glad, she is obliged to walk under a cloud of sorrow
and condemnation because her husband, while ignoring his own duty,
expects her to fulfill both her own and his to his satisfaction, regardless
of preventing circumstances
Many husbands do not sufficiently understand and appreciate the
cares and perplexities which their wives endure, generally confined
all day to an unceasing round of household duties. They frequently
come to their homes with clouded brows, bringing no sunshine to
the family circle. If the meals are not on time, the tired wife, who
is frequently housekeeper, nurse, cook, and housemaid, all in one, is
greeted with faultfinding. The exacting husband may condescend to
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take the worrying child from the weary arms of its mother that her
arrangements for the family meal may be hastened; but if the child is
restless and frets in the arms of its father, he will seldom feel it his
duty to act the nurse and seek to quiet and soothe it. He does not pause
to consider how many hours the mother has endured the little one’s
fretfulness, but calls out impatiently, “Here, Mother, take your child.”
1
The Signs of the Times, December 6, 1877
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